Oh my gah. I lost my textbook the day before my finals?
What is so perplexing though, which totally is not what I should be focusing on - but - how did i lose a huge ass textbook? My textbooks usually have designated areas = on the self, 2nd layer, or on top of this divider box thing which is sitting on the top of the shelf or on my printer which is also on the top of the shelf. How did I lose this thing? The last time I remember actually using it was for the midterm - took it to school. That said, I’m pretty sure I had it after the midterm because I remember checking in my bag after since it wasn’t before- and remember seeing it on my shelf a while ago. I’m so confused as to how it happened. My head has been wrapped around this for at least 15 min now. what????????
Everything doesn’t really matter at this moment. I just got to push through the last two weeks before I figure out the rest of my life.
A new section of life will begin - for the better or the worse. Like I said before, if I don’t get there, I will keep trying, but that will come later.
Until then, jiao~
So I was continuing with my dehydration process with my parasites for making slides but there were no beakers left, so I used a plastic cup to pipet out my liquid, which was a HUGE MISTAKE. I had to remove all the liquid, put back 12 drops (1:3 etoh-xylene solution) and then in put more xylene. I put all the liquid in the plastic cup, and as I lifted the plastic cup to pipet the liquid back, the sides literally came up and the bottom was stuck on the table. My eyes popped. Apparently xylene melts plastic. Whoops. Learn something new everyday.
Since similar topic - I decided to just edit this post
During research in lab today, I found my first nematode in alligator guts I was doing! My first nematode ever! It was huuuge compared to trematode. So, I was happy. =) Parasitology class is killing me though.
So, counselor told me to exercise
I was sore after a day of memorial weekend shopping. haha. does that count?
When you’re waiting for a reply.
When you’re trying to not reach out again.
Trying to not send another message.
But still the last words you said hang in the air.
But not responded.
Finally in bed before 12. Unfortunately that’s due to my total of 13 hrs of sleep for past 3 nights. Do the math. Huge headache.
And guess I’m a lil bit in a mess.
Wish I had someone I could rely on. Would actually have a conversation with me when I say I feel bad.Tired of reaching out
Edit (different day): It’s funny (not really), how friends just disappear when you’re upset.
It really makes me question friendships at times like these.
You see, the thing is (as with my other post about caring) if any of the people who I actually call “friends” was really upset, I’d drop everything I’m doing and listen/talk to them -wtv - or ask if can wait a little if i really cant stop and give a timeframe because I care. I don’t care if it’s the same topic over and over again, unless probably if what I say is completely disregarded, which I don’t think has happened yet. I’d still stop and listen, even right before an exam (which I have done before), even if I’m last minute frantically trying to cram.
Unfortunately, I can’t say that’s the same for what others will do.
I think that’s another thing that lacks in a lot of people - not good at listening when it comes to others peoples’ stuff
Is this just how everyone/people work? Selective responses/selective listening?
That makes me sad sometimes, and perhaps makes me think, maybe it’s just not worth sharing anymore. It certainly doesn’t make me feel better. If anything it actually makes me feel worse when people just disappear knowing obviously they got my distress.
And even sadder, I can’t be like because you don’t listen to me, maybe next time, I won’t listen to you, or listen as well, or drop everything and prioritize you first - because I will, I will still drop everything to listen or ask to wait a little bit if I can’t stop what I’m doing and give a time frame because that’s just what I do for my friends.
I’m not saying it happens every time, but it has happened enough and I’m not trying to self-pity. Just that a handful of times this year, it just crossed my mind to maybe rethink what friendship really is/means.
when you lose your phone in the blanket and you just
It’s been a long day. Last quarter is not doing me justice.
Things done today and checked off list of things to do:
Napped 3 hours yesterday - lab practical at 11:00am-12:20pm
Class from 2:00pm-5:00pm
Dinner with aunt and cousin at 7:00pm
Calculate rent for roommates
Sent out email about security deposit info plus year end move out/lease blah blah (sometimes I wonder why am I the one taking care of all this)
Rearranged some stuff in the room - too messy
Watch my ebay bidding get outbid - bid again to be outbid - sad because it passed the value I said I would go to, so I stopped bidding
and it’s 12:10am. I guess not very productive
Things must do before bed:
Finish + Print Group Report
All I want to do is crawl in bed and sleep or listen to music and watch a bunch of shows, drink the boba in my fridge that’s pretty much untouched.
On the bright side - memorial weekend coming up!
Sometimes I wish I didn’t care soo much
I usually try to think what is the right thing to do, what will other people like, what is best for them, how will they feel, or how does it affect their health, what would make it easier for them, think of everything ahead of time so everything will go smoothly.
But sometimes it all makes me tired or worried or ______ (i don’t know the word) - it’s an extra emotional burden that’s maybe unnecessary sometimes? no one else cares to such an extent.